Seven Common Avoidable Divorce Mistakes

The complexity of divorce processes may prompt spouses to commit blunders both knowingly and unknowingly. These mistakes may seem very common and minor but some of them cause damages that are beyond repair. If you and your spouse can avoid them mistakes discussed below then you will have a very smooth transition during divorce.

1.       Ignorance of the Legal Procedure and Requirements

Before you sign any legal divorce agreement document you should always read and understand its content. Probably you should even try to discuss it with a trusted friend or legal help from an attorney. For a DIY divorce, you should rich with knowledge regarding the divorce process in your respective state.

You should also not over trust your divorce lawyer and let him/her do everything for you. The process involves a lot of things like gathering all financial documents, splitting financial assets and property and finding a new home for yourself and your children if you win their custody. Trusting your attorney with all these responsibilities might turn messy because you will never find a lawyer to do all these things.  You need to get involved in some of these processes because the attorney will only handle the legal part of your case.

2.       Thinking That You Can Handle Divorce Without a Therapist

A great part of divorce involves dealing with emotional trauma. If you think you are mentally strong and that you can go through the divorce process all by yourself you are very wrong. When you are married, you spend a lot of time together and your partner learns what buttons to press when they need something from you.

During divorce, you get trapped in constant battles. Your partner will probably pick a soft spot in you and try to get your worst side. Acquiring the services of a professional divorce therapist or divorce coach will help you stay focused and confident throughout and after the process. 

Without a therapist you might end up in messy scenarios where you fight over cheap personal items. These personal items like ashtray and blender might make you spend way above the total cost of buying new ones.

3.       Ignoring Child Custody and Child Support Aspect

This mistake is very common in DIY divorce. Ignoring this concept in most cases comes back to haunt you. In some state, only shelter, clothing and food are involved in the marital settlement agreement.

When you decide to move out of your home, you should not always do it with your kids without following the due legal process unless the reason for your divorce was extreme continued domestic violence.  By ignoring the legalities necessary, you create a loophole in the case and your partner can always find a reason to compel the judge to order you to take the kids back to your marital home.

4.       Ignorance of Court Orders and Procedures

From the moment you or your partner file for divorce the divorce court will begin giving orders. You should make sure that you understand every order and documentation and that you comply with each one of them.

Failure to comply with court orders might have dire consequences that include jail terms and huge fines. You might even end up paying for your spouse lawyer’s fees.  You should first understand that judges do not give suggestions but rather important orders that are to be followed to the later. From the filing process to honoring court appearances, you should always adhere to them.

Complying with these order is crucial as you will gain an important advantage in the case and also help you avoid costly financial spending. In any case, you feel that the court order does not comply with your interests, you should follow the necessary legal procedures to try modifying them.

5.       Ignoring Future Financial Obligations and Status

Divorce comes with a lot of negative results both financially and socially. Lack of proper planning and budgeting for post-divorce life might have severe financial effects.  After you separate from your spouse certain financial obligations like spousal support, child support, new insurance costs and settlement of marital debts might for part of your recurrent expenses.

Some of the effects that are associated with lack of proper planning for divorce include failure to include the concept of spousal support in the divorce agreement for in cases where one party is financially challenged and a spouse is left with the whole burden of child support.

6.       Letting Emotions Cloud Your Judgment

Emotional stress and frustration are always evident in divorce processes. If you cannot afford the service of a professional coach then you should try as much as possible to make sound decisions.  Emotions and tempers can fly high in cases where there is a disagreement in matters to deal with children and division of property and assets. 

Effects of letting your emotions supersede your judgment may include you and your spouse fighting for over petty household items that none of you really need. Emotions may also prolong the divorce process and make you incur unwanted financial losses.

If you find your emotions having a better part of you then you need to take some time off, relax and sober up before you make any decision. Your lawyer may also be helpful in such cases by helping you avoid common divorce mistakes.

7.       Confiding Too Much on Other People

As much as you are going through a rough process during divorce, you should not give all the details to the wrong people. Not everyone is to be trusted in this life. Some people will use the information you give them for their own advantage and potentially hurt you.

Issues relating to your top secrets and finances should only be shared with the third party when requested by a judge or your contracted attorney.

Bottom line

The divorce processes involve a lot of minor and major issues that if not well considered can make the process very long and regrettable.  Some of these mistakes may seem very negligible but they have severe repercussions.

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